I Will Not Snack Alone

By Adam J. Kurtz

Something changed in 2014, though subtly. I stopped seeing my friends as often. I stopped “going out” as often. I sat in front of screens alone, communicated in front of screens alone, and ate in front of screens alone. Most of this was the result of a grueling & unpredictable work schedule, but soon it became comfortable. I know I’m not the only person eating ice cream and binge watching Netflix in the dark.

As we make resolutions for 2015, I have a proposition. Sure, we could claim to go to the gym more often, to make more time for family or travel. Those are all great goals. But here’s mine: In 2015, I will not snack alone.

By combining two of life’s greatest pleasures, “having friends” and “enjoying treats,” I will ensure that both happen, and that they are truly enjoyable. I would like to elevate my snacking from a solitary ritual to an immersive experience, sharing the pure joy of a perfect snack with a friend. I want new excuses to try new things, crossing my city to find a new pastry, discovering the perfect pretzel, or perfecting my own chips at home. I’m ready to get serious about cocoa beans and ice creams. I want to kick my sad, sorry, solo snacking habit once and for all.

I’m not being unrealistic here—sometimes, out of necessity, we eat meals alone. I mean, you’ve got to sustain your simple human body. But snacking is another thing, an extra, unnecessary joy that separates us from less chocolate-covered, cheesy-powder-licking beasts. That’s what I will only do with others. It adds a third, health-conscious angle that’s in line with more traditional resolutions, making this a fully acceptable addition to your list.

So join me, literally, and we’ll snack better, smarter, and harder than ever before in 2015.