Grace Danico

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You’re standing outside a 7-11 when the aliens land. They can only survive on Earth for 2 minutes and you only have 2 dollars. What snack do you buy to teach them about humanity and provide sustenance for their long journey home?

A sweaty quarter pound 7-11 Big Bite hot dog with all the trimmings.

You’ve been counting for months and finally your baby daughter has enough teeth to chew a chip. Which chip do you choose to start her human snacking experience?

Mama’s favorite: cheesy crunchy Cheetos

You’re a rebel and you’ve just won the war. What do you and your comrades munch on together as a free people?

We won the war against ice cream, and celebrate with ice cream sandwiches.

You’re 10 years old and you mom has asked you to clean your room one too many times so you’re running away. There’s enough change in your piggy bank and enough space in your bindle to bring one snack into your new life. What do you buy down at the general store?

Crunchy Cheetos: then, now, always.

You’re up in the club and you’ve just fallen in love. But in the morning, for reasons you’ll never fully understand, he or she will be gone. What snack will you buy at the corner store before you Uber back to your place? What snack will you pair with the the one that gets away?

Pre-game with some salt and pepper Kettle chips. For the morning after, Ritter Sport Butter Biscuit.